If Life Were a Videogame - Katamari's

Life is no walk in the park. Slogging it through school, looking for a job, getting no shifts 'coz Sam's Warehouse has gone into receivership (fuck); this is life. We hate it sometimes but it's all we've got. Life is full of problems but according to We Love Katamari (read my reviews my minions) all of lifes problems can be solved in some abstract way using Katamari's. All anyone has to do in We Love Katamari is stand outside waving their arms and yelling to get the attention of the King of the Cosmos and then after a short brown-nosing session the King will order that a Katamari be dispatched to solve the problem. Let me just put this into a real life scenario. In real life, to get a job, you need a slick resume a suit and the skills to convince an employer that you are, in actuality, THE SHIT. It can be grooling and take anywhere up to and beyond a week. In the world of Katamari's however, if I wanted a job I'd stand outside shouting "Jobs!" over and over and eventually the King of the Cosmos will hear me out. At first he will scourne the idea of helping me but all I'd have to do is say "the King is jolly good" and he'll bend over backwards to make sure I get employed. Then what'll happen is the Prince will roll things up in a katamari until he can roll up the employer or even the entire company and then somehow this will get me a job. It's quick, fun and abstract. I like it. Plus you get to chat with the crazy old King of the Cosmos and he'll probably turn your workplace into a planet. Actually this kinda brings me to another point. If life WERE a world of rolling shit up to turn into stars then We Love Katamari is kind of disturbing. People and animals are often rolled up into katamaris along with all sorts of other crap and these katamari's are always either thrown into space as planets or blown into stardust. Two veeeerrrry unappealing fates there. So although Katamaris are seeminly excellent tools for employment or building campfires they come at the price of potentially being rolled up between a dozen thumbtacs and an elephants arse before being thrown into space to orbit helplessly until you die. Still, we all need jobs.