Friday, April 22, 2011

Friday, Rebecca Black and the Internet

Happy Nailed to Wood Day readers! I hope we all went out today and played a small part in the death of somebody's deity. So yes it's Easter Friday over here in Australia and I thought it presented a golden opportunity to talk about Rebecca Black, her song "Friday" and why the internet is balls. I guess this post could've easily been done on any Friday but fuck it, if the whole "dying for our sins" story isn't going to even bother making any sense at all then I don't see why I can't make a teensy weensy stretch every now and then.

So anyway as I'm sure all you computer savvy types are aware Rebecca Black is some underage American girl who managed to do the impossible and record a song that has more dislikes on Youtube than Justin Bieber. For anyone who isn't familiar with the song here's the link. Now you have no excuses.


Now because my family are an ironic bunch we actually have a Friday morning ritual where we gather 'round a computer and share the awful hilarity that is this song. Now that is not to say we actually like this song. We just find it hilariously bad. But there's also something sweet and endearing about it's complete lack of quality and inspiration. I actually think Rebecca Black is a bit adorable in a completely non-creepy kind of way. The way she sings her garbage song with a big smile on her face and sways around enthusiastically without even a hint of exploiting her womanly wares is so endearing. Rebecca Black looks like she's purely in it for the fun, fun, fun, fun; which is actually refreshing in todays cynical, marketing fueled, bleak existence we find ourselves in.

But the internet can be a harsh place. On the internet every single person is on a soapbox and decided to projectile vomit instead of giving a speech. The annonymitty the internet allows us has also allowed for the growth of giant, errect dicks on everyones heads. Everyone developes a sort of twisted messiah complex, which I guess makes this post relevant to Easter after all. I mention this because Rebecca Black, who is 14 or some shit, is getting absolutely flamed by every man and his dog and some of it gets quite nasty. In an interview a reporter tactlessly asks Rebecca "have any of these comments made you cry?" Rebecca attempted to brush the question aside but luckily the reporter was there to remind her of some of the worst ones she's read. "I hope you develope and eating disorder and become attractive" the trashy journo quotes. Rebecca chokes up slightly but manages to brave through it all with more than just a hint of that youthful enthusiasm seen in her video. Rebecca even made a rather humorous video that claimed various bullshit metaphores and subtexts were present in the song, making it much deeper than most people were aware. And that's why I like her I guess. She was way too young to be exposing her crappy pop song to the festering swamps of the internet but at least she is able to shrug it off and have a laugh about it.

So I guess my point here is this. Don't be such a fucking awful jerk. I know it's the internet and you like to shock people with your references to Hitler and suicide. There's a thousand differences between being clever or cynical and just being a plain old cunt. I realise I'm literally powerless to stop such behaviour but I tell you what. If I have at least one crazed fan out there who hospitalizes someone who actually wished death or rape on Rebecca Black then my blog will have been worth it.

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