The Infinite Possiblogities Guide to Blogging

This picture has nothing to do with the post. Just thought a steam-punk Pacman was pretty awesome.

It's time I faced the facts. I'm becoming a bit lazy when it comes to my blog these days, and the quality of Infinite Possiblogities is suffering because of it. So it's time to step up and lift my game. I realise that writing a blog about "how to blog" in order to save your own blog is an extremely risky move. The risk is, of course, looking like a desperate and confused tosser trying to claw back some credability. Anyway, jerking off aside I present to you the Infinite Possiblogities Guide to Blogging.

The first thing to do when starting a blog is perhaps to plan ahead for maybe a week or two in advance. Starting off a blog impulsively is fine but you run the risk of running out of steam by the 3rd post and wondering what it is you actually wanna say. The purpose of your blog is something you're going to find hard to justify to yourself on a daily basis. Once you're over that little hurdle it's time to think of a name for your blog. Here I strongly advise against calling your blog anything like "Whatever" or "Just Started This Coz I was Bored." Be a bit more creative than that. Try and clarify or convey some sort of purpose in your title. There would have to be millions of half-arsed, 2 post blogs out there and calling your blog "Stuff" will likly convince potential readers that your blog is one of them. Anyway once your cool, new blog is up and running it's time to start the actual blogging process and belive me this is no easy task. If you imagine that a blog is like a child. You have to nourish it with regular, wholesome posts so that it becomes big and strong. But too many junk posts and your blog will become bloated and unattractive to look at. It might even become the victim of bullying by the other cool blogs. Speaking of bullying, going out and acting like a complete tool on the internet can actually be a good thing in terms of boosting your number of readers and it gives you something to post about if your imagination otherwise fails you. For example if I went out to some other random blogs and started leaving negative feedback they will probably get offended and either blog about you or comment on one of your blogs. If you retaliate there will be a bit of an online feud involving friends and fans and the potential for dragging more allies into the fray is slightly increased. Of course this may not always pay off. If you're a totally, unlikable douche then it is possible you will turn people off but then it's hard to say because even people who annonymously spout uninformed hate accross the net seem to get alot of readers (mostly because of that I'd say). Now this is actually something I've never personally stooped to. I've always challenged myself and held myself to a higher standard than that and have resisted using any cheap tricks to win over fans. There is also the option of sending compliments instead of stiring shit. Again this is a tactic I don't employ myself but keep in mind that my blog is slowing wanking itself into a horrid mess, so perhaps following what I do isn't the most prosperous move you could make.

PS if all else fails you could always try taking cheap shots at pornographic movies. I didn't even know anyone read my blogs until I did that.

The Interview part 1

I have spent all morning on my bed, phone by my side running over answers in my head in anticipation of the phone interview I was about to have. Yes, that's right. Mr. B could soon be working at the local Sanity store. Not only would this be a source of income it may also give me new posting topics. Anyway I had the interview and felt pretty good about it. At this point I'd like to say just how cool phone interviews are. None of this wondering if you'll look well dressed or like a mommy's boy, over the phone you're judged in areas I feel much more comfortable in. There I was, in a familiar and comfortable environment, trying to impress the interviewer in my PJ's. Anyway whether I get the job or not I'll be told by Friday and I'll pass the verdict on to you. Will it be a moment of glory or failure? Stay tuned and find out!

This Post's Too Shit for a Title

Let me just start off by saying that I have officially managed to keep this blog updated daily for 3 weeks. You may recall from my very first post that I was skeptical of my abilities to offer anything worth reading and predicted that I would be packing an unfinished blog into the back of the closet. It's kinda strange admitting this but I find blogging a satisfying and enriching experience. Just though I'd let you know, that IS what blogging is all about after all (isn't it?).

Fuck! I was gonna post some more shit, but I'm needed elsewhere right now. Many appologies to my loyal readers who have come to expect more from me, but this might have to be all for today. Perhaps you might like to bask in the irony of the fact that this post was supposed to celebrate my unexpected longevity and in itself is by far one of the shortest postings I've ever made. Once again, sorry guys. Hopefully I've greatly improved by Monday.

PS. Got our new fridge this afternoon. It's fucking sweet!

This is How I Will Lose My Fans

Brace yourselves people. I am about to do something quite wankerish and absurd. Perhaps you will find a enough parody and self-loathing in this to find it acceptable; perhaps you will delete me from your favourites list and stop recommending me to your friends. But blow the costs. Today I review...my own blog.

Mr. B is the creative mind behind the Infinite Possiblogities page on Blogspot. Posts on Infinite Possiblogities consist largely of observations and pseudo-reviews written in an informal, manner and are often highly critical. Posts often feature questionable language and grammer that may prove too abraisive and amature for a wide demographic. These posts are often laced with humour although one might argue that the jokes are often few and far between; leaving mostly clumsy and often flimsy remarks that often read like sidenotes of a larger review that is absent altogether. Some posts, particularly possitive ones, are far too lengthy and come across as over indulgent (reviewing things that are only of interest to him). It is hard to imagine who the intended audience actually is. Reviews are often written retrospectively and would therefore have minimal impact and provide little incentive for an occassional reader to read his posts on a daily basis (which is the frequency at which he posts). Mr.b often jokingly cites close friends and family as readers although it is hard to imagine, say, his own mother reading it. In the end it is hard not to conclude that the intended audience is infact himself.

Whilst perhaps enjoyable as a few minutes of escapism, it is hard to recomment myself to anyone other than my girlfriend, friends and myself.